Watching The CW

We’ve already had a peek at the and chatted about some of the new and returning shows, so the question now is what are the exact dates and times when the shows I care about are coming back. Well, The Futon Critic has an amazing list that you should check out here. It’s an incredible list, which includes every show, new and returning (and even cancelled), when it airs, what network its on, and how many eps there are. Awesome!

As for the CW, returning this Fall are America’s Next Top Model, Everybody Hates Chris, The Game, Gossip Girl, One Tree Hill, Smallville and Supernatural, with Reaper coming back as a mid-season show in 2009.

Cancelled shows from last season include Aliens in America, Beauty and the Geek, Crowned: The Mother of all Pageants, CW Now, Girlfriends, Life is Wild, Online Nation and Pussycat Dolls: Girlicious. Farmer Wants a Wife is listed as on hiatus or fate to be determined.

As mentioned, there is a full slate of new shows for Fall, which are 90210, Easy Money, In Harm’s Way, Privileged, Stylista, Surviving Suburbia and Valentine, Inc., plus one new show, 13: Fear is Real, scheduled for 2009.
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This blog was written a week ago to be posted after the finale of Farmer Wants a Wife aired. Unfortunately, 451 Press was having some server issues and I was unable to post it sooner. I apologise.

So here we are at the finale of Farmer Wants a Wife. First up, they do a little recap of the previous eliminations. Christa and Brooke obviously don’t like each other, and Christa points out that they couldn’t be more different, which is true, so you gotta wonder what he’s thinking picking these two.

Matt starts them out with a list of farmer’s wife activities - some of it is weird stuff - that each one has to do today while he is at work. Brooke has to bring the chickens somewhere and pick up pies, Christa has to pick up a carburetor or something like that for Matt and pay his tab at the store. Christa does a little shopping while she is at the store. She asks for condoms and if there are any sex shops around there. There are not. She thinks she’s bring spice to the country. I think she means skankiness.

Some of the chores were a little gross, like Christa had to carry a dead deer head to be mounted. I could not do that. No man would be worth that. Seriously.

Brooke gets stuck behind a slow moving train and Christa beats her back to the house. Matt is almost starting to look cuter, except for that silly little goatee thingy. Matt has made lunch for them. I can’t imagine the tension at that table.

Matt is taking them each on a date. He tells Brooke he will pick her up in 30 minutes and to be very, very casual. He tells Christa he will pick her up at 7 pm and she should dress a little more formally. Of course, Brooke is thinking that he thinks she is just a fun friend-girl, and that Christa is the more datable chick. Christa is thinking that she has four hours to get ready so she’ll look so much better than Brooke.

Matt and Brooke go four wheeling, which looks like fun, and have a picnic meal. Matt wants Brooke to be less reserved so he can really get to know her. Brooke wants to tell him she loves him, but she is afraid of the rejection. I say, if you’re gonna do it, now is the time. She thinks she totally blew it, and I think so, too.

Matt picks up Christa in a horse drawn carriage for a romantic date. He calls her “princess” and he is wearing the sunglasses she bought him earlier. I was so hoping he would not pick Christa, but I’m afraid he is going to. But maybe that’s just what they want us to think.

Matt takes Christa to his house, which has deer heads on the wall, and lots of dead animal rugs. Yuck! Christa thinks so, too. They have a lovely dinner on the back porch out under the stars. I actually had to go back and rewind, since I realized that Matt and Christa were talking and talking, and I had no idea what they were saying. They discussed what their concerns were, Christa is wondering what she will do for a living there (I guess there isn’t a big call for hookers), and Matt is worried cause she beat him at fishing. He really seems to like her a lot. Why are men so stupid? She’s so phony and catty. Then they make out a while, and then Matt says he has to get her back home. They just don’t seem to be able to stop kissing, but I think its mostly cause Christa is a kiss slut.

Brooke is so depressed and pretty sure that she’s not going to be the one, that I am now starting to wonder if it could really be that obvious.

Just looking at their profiles, Brooke comes across as so much nicer and more real. Brooke puts her faith first in her life, Christa wants to hit every bar in New York City. Yikes!

So now the entire town has turned out to see who Matt picks. He tells them by tonight, someone will be going back to the city and someone will be going home with him. Um, Matt, aren’t you going to wait until after the wedding for that? Matt gets up on the platform, and talks about the girls. How fun “Miss B” is and how she wins all the challenges, how Christa is so spunky and ready to do it at any time. Yep, we know that. Then he corrects himself when people start to laugh, and says ready to have a blast at any time.

Matt chooses to announce his decision by having a crop duster fly over with a banner proclaiming the chosen girl’s name. Both girls are so nervous. So is Matt. I’m just ready for this to be over.

Here comes the plane . . . and the Farmer has chosen . . . (drum roll, please) . . . Matt hearts Brooke! Wow, I’m so glad. Then comes the uncomfortable part, where Matt has to say goodbye to Christa on the platform in front of everyone, while she cries. Then Brooke and Christa hug.

Matt says he felt a connection to Christa, but he felt love for Brooke. Matt and Brooke ride off down the road on a tractor with tin cans tied on the back. And they say romance is dead. Or maybe they just wish it.

Farmer Wants a Wife only has one more week to go after this episode. Finally. We are now down to the final four: Christa, Kanisha, Brooke and Amanda. Amanda is sort of a dark horse in this, because she doesn’t do much to draw attention to herself. She no where near as annoying as Christa and Kanisha, but still, I don’t care for her that much. More and more, I’m hoping he picks Brooke. But we’ll see.

This week Matt decides that the girls need a little bit of the city, so he has each one of the girls best friends come to stay the night. It was very exciting for them, and I can see that. I would be thrilled, too.

Immediately Christa starts telling her friend about the “people we don’t like.” Oh please. See, that’s why I don’t like her. She’s a mean girl. And, of course, her friend immediately wants Matt to take his shirt off. I already don’t like her, too.

Apparently, this week, there will be no sitting pretty, so that Matt can determine what he really wants, from his heart. That’s really a better idea, I think. Matt has planned a dinner party for his family for that night, and has asked the the chicks to cook dinner for them. For 45 people! The girls cook, set up in the barn and are still getting ready when all these people show up. Kanisha steps up and invites everyone in and makes them comfortable. Then they bring all the food out and set it up. The food actually looks good, and I’m kinda surprised, cause they didn’t strike me as being culinary masters.

Everyone seems to like Brooke right away, cause she just so comfortable and friendly. The family then gets to ask the girls any questions they want. They ask Kanisha why she can’t find a man in the city. Her answer was rambling and nonsensical. They ask Amanda what Matt farms. She has no idea. They ask Christa’s friend why Christa wants to marry a farmer. She says that Christa needs someone genuine. (Really? When she’s such a fake sneaky person?) They ask Brooke what one thing about Matt would she change. That’s he’s dating three other women. Duh.

The chicks then ask questions of the family. Kanisha asks Matt’s mom if she’s see a farmer’s wife sitting there. Yes, she does. Kanisha’s friend is crying and saying that she has fallen in love with the whole family.

Matt then takes the girls on a group date to go fishing. True story, my husband and I went to the Thousand Islands for our 5th anniversary and we stayed over a boathouse on a private island. We went out fishing one day and I caught a fish, completely by accident, and when my husband took it off the hook to throw back in the water, it was dead. I killed a fish. It was extremely traumatic for me and I’ve never gone fishing against since. On the trip, Christa caught the first fish, Kanisha was afraid of the worms, and the girl’s boat took on water and sunk. So it turned into a swimming party. Then mean girl Christa threw one of Brooke’s flip flops in the lake. Why would you do something like that? Well, I guess if you are a mean, immature person you might.

Each girl has some one-on-one time with Matt before the eliminations. Kanisha tells him that this has been a life changing experience. Brooke asks Matt about how he feels and tells him how much she loves being there and being around him. Christa tells Matt he needs to keep her around. Amanda says that its been hard for her to fully open up to him in this situation, but that if they continue, it will get even better.

I’d get rid of Amanda this week. Maybe Kanisha. Honestly, though, I wish it could be Christa cause she’s not a nice person and she doesn’t deserve a sweet, innocent guy like Matt. For elimination this week, Matt has them use shotguns to shoot a target made of cans. Behind each set of cans is a sign, either “sitting pretty” or “going back to the city.” I was on the rifle team in high school and I still have really good aim. Ready, aim, fire. Christa and Brooke are safe. Amanda is shocked, cause she’s going home. Kanisha didn’t hit the cans, so she has to go run over and knock the cans down. But guess what? She’s going home, too! She didn’t take it as well as Amanda.

So its between Christa and Brooke, which is so perfect, since they hate each other. Or at least Christa hates Brooke. Matt then takes both girls on a date. Neither one of them is happy that the other one will be there. Matt tells the girls to get their bathing suits cause he’s set up a little country hot tub. Matt and Christa feed each other cherries, and then Brooke gets into the act. They ask Matt if they will be getting any alone time with him. Then Christa brings up the fact that she and Brooke don’t really get along, rehashing the whole thing about when she felt that Brooke had ruined her date with Matt, way back in the first week. I say, get over it already. Move on.

Next week should be pretty interesting.

The Battle of the 80’s Has-Beens. Have you heard of it? Well, its not a real show, but it would be cool if it was. Its a fictitious show from the movie Music and Lyrics. Alex Fletcher, played by Hugh Grant, is a washed up composer from a defunct 80’s band called Pop. Alex is pitched to be on the show, The Battle of the 80’s Has-Beens, which supposedly airs on the CW. Alex asks them how many songs they want him to sing, assuming, as I did, that the show is a sort of Celebrity F-lister American Idol, with individuals competing through song.

He’s wrong. They want the contestants to literally “battle” in the boxing ring. Which is funnier for the purposes of the movie, of course, but not what I was imagining. By the way, Music and Lyrics is a cute movie. I don’t say it will change your world or anything, but if you haven’t seen it, its worth spending a couple of hours with Hugh Grant and Drew Barrymore. And I’m not much of a fan of either of them.

But, anyway, back to the 80’s Has-Beens. I’ve been thinking, it would be fun to have a show like that. Not the boxing thing, of course, but a show where lost but not forgotten 80’s stars can perform against each other. I’d watch it. And why wouldn’t the CW do it. Obviously, they aren’t too worried about taste, since they are the network that cancelled Veronica Mars and brought us such shows as Farmer Wants a Wife and Pussycat Dolls: Girlicious.

So, if anyone from the programming department at the CW is reading this blog, please consider this my request. Let’s have the Battle of the 80’s Has-Beens (it will probably make a great mid-season replacement). And, if you’d like, I’m available for consultation.

Farmer Wants a Wife starts off, as usual, with an unnecessary recap. Thankfully, I’ve started a little late tonight, so I can fast forward through all the parts I don’t want to watch. Of course, if that were really true, I’d just keep the fast forward key pressed down until I saw the closing credits.

There are now five girls left, and Ashley seems kinda unhappy to still be there because she didn’t have a great date with Matt. This week, the girls get makeovers: pedicures, manicures and hairdos. They aren’t too excited because the women who will be doing their hair have country hairdos, like side ponytails. But actually, the up-dos look pretty good.

Matt’s idea is for the girls to perform in a talent show, as a challenge, with the town people deciding who does the best. He brings in this trunk filled with silly costumes, plastic batons and hoola hoops. Then they decide what they are each going to do. Christa decides that she will sing, Brooke is gonna teach a line dance. Christa thinks that is silly. I can almost see where this is going. But Christa deserves to get knocked down more often anyway. They try to sing a round of Old McDonald for the finale, but end up bickering to the point that Kanisha walks away and starts packing. Once she talks it over with everyone, she changes her mind and stays. Clearly.

Christa goes first and she does a weird version of Take Me Out to the Ballgame. She thinks she’s talented. I think she’s scary. Ashley is next and she’s totally upset, because she has no talent. So she tells a silly joke and then she makes herself disappear. If only that were true. Kanisha hoola hoops. Badly. (Can you use hoola hoop as a verb?) Next is Amanda who sings the Star Spangled Banner. Fortunately, they don’t make us sit through the entire thing. It wasn’t exactly bad, but it wasn’t that great either. Brooke is last and she teaches the crowd to do the Electric Slide. Christa has an issue with it, of course.

The finale is the girls singing Old Matt Had a Farm. We have to sit through that whole thing, unfortunately. The winner of the talent show is Brooke. I’m not even a little bit surprised. Christa was kinda rude about it, which is also not surprising. I think the town people really like Brooke. Honestly, I do, too.

I hope that Ashley is gone this week. I’m getting more and more tired of her.

Matt arrives in a school bus to see the girls, with a date box. No, sorry, that a Bachelor thing. Matt comes with a gift for Brooke of some really nice boots.

Matt then proposes a hog roast. We’ve done that before and its really a lot of fun. The girls, however, acted like they had no idea what he was talking about. I live in a city, too, but I’m not an idiot, apparently. Ashley and Christa (sorta) get really grossed out by the hog cooking on the spit. I can’t imagine someone making a good farmer’s wife if they don’t care for meat. Then they sit around the campfire and play Truth or Dare. Matt asks Ashley if she finds him attractive and she says yes. She asks him if she is going home. Silence. Well, cut to commercial anyway. The truth is that Matt definitely has two people he is thinking about sending home and she is one of them. I’d say Ashley or Amanda. But Christa wants it to be Kanisha. Matt then asks Ashley if she wants to be there and she says yes.

Brooke pulls Matt aside to tell him that she was a little repulsed by the Matt/Christa kissy thing (he got something on his lips and she licked it off, while Brooke was standing right there), but that she was very attracted to him. She also reminds him that she is the only one that hasn’t had a one-on-one date yet.

The next day Matt has the chicks do pregnancy tests on cows. This includes inserting their arm in the rectum of the cow. He is going to use this for the elimination. Whoever gets the not pregnant cow is going home. I’d elect to go right now, if I had to do that. I’d just turn around, pack up my stuff, and never look back. Both Christa and Amanda have a pregnant cow, so that leaves Ashley and Kanisha. Kanisha’s cow is pregnant. Ashley’s isn’t. Big surprise there. I think Ashley is excited to leave. Matt thinks so, too. Christa is gonna miss her little mean girl pal.

Brooke (Matt calls her Miss B, for some reason) gets the date. Wow, this show is just full of surprises. Matt and Brooke take a small motor boat out onto a little lake or pond and they sit and have iced tea or something. Brooke tells Matt he makes her nervous. Matt asks her why she has charmed the whole town. Then they discuss how many kids they want, and Matt says she isn’t very affectionate. In the middle of him speaking, Brooke leans over and just kisses him. Brooke loved the date. I think Matt did, too.

Once again, I force myself to sit through Farmer Wants a Wife. As I sit here, I wonder, is anyone else watching this show? Will anyone even read my review? Does my life have meaning? OK, maybe not that, but I do have to think of something while watching this show, or my brain will dissolve and dribble out of my ears.

I’ve been trying to decide who I want to win this thing. Of the six girls left, Kanisha seems the most genuine. Amanda, Ashley and Christa are like the mean girls. They definitely aren’t people I’d want to deal with myself. Brooke and Lisa are portrayed as pretty phony and so that just leaves Kanisha. Except that I just don’t like her, cause she’s annoying. Is there a money prize, too? Or is it just about the farmer?

They start out this week shearing sheep. I’d be afraid of one of these chicks hurting a poor little sheep, if I was Matt. I know I would never do it. Ever. Never, ever. Ashley showed more personality than she has before, but as it turns out, she’s crude.

Next, Matt sends them out to see Miss Donna so they can learn to bake pies. Matt’s favorite is apple pie a la mode. Mine, too, coincidentally. Now this is one contest I wouldn’t mind. I’m not the world’s best baker, but I am a good cook, and I make thousands and thousands of cookies for weddings and stuff. So the girls have to bake pies that are going to be judged at the fair. Whoever wins is “sitting pretty.” I have had my problems with pie crust in the past, but I’m definitely capable. Of course, I’m older than these chicks. But I could bake and cook when I was even younger than they are now.

Just watching this is making me want to bake a pie. I’m thinking custard or coconut cream.

Matt comes over that night and they start playing a drinking game. Matt goes around and asks the girls if they are ready to get married. He called Christa “sweetie,” which made me want to vomit. Then Ashley used some bad language and Matt called her behavior inappropriate. I think she might go home soon.

My husband came in the room briefly and stopped to look at the “hot chicks.” After about 2 minutes he walked away, cause they were “so annoying.” So tell me, how long will Matt be able to deal with them.

Off to the fair the next day and Matt wins some prizes for the girls. Well, actually, he wins a teddy bear that goes to Brooke, who has received all the other prizes so far.

You know what I’m noticing, more and more? That Brooke kinda looks like Britney Spears. What do you think?

At the pie judging, the winner is Amanda, which gives her immunity. Now Ashley is even more worried about her drunken behavior in front of Matt. The girls then get introduced to Matt’s family, his mom, dad and sister. Most of the girls showed some interest, except for Lisa, who seemed to hang off to the back of the bunch. They then do all sort of silly fair stuff, like the dunk tank and the kissing booth. All the girls kiss Matt except for Brooke, who will only kiss him on the cheek. It makes me wonder if that will intrigue him more than the others. I mean, she could just be being a “good” girl.

At elimination, they get to find out who is leaving, because that person’s name will be up in lights. Huh. I know I’d want to be humiliated in front of a crowd at the fair that way. Both Ashley and Lisa think it’s going to be them, and one of them is right. It’s Lisa.

Now its time for the date and the only two left that Matt hasn’t been on a date with yet are Ashley and Brooke. He picks Ashley, because he wants to learn more about her. It also makes me think that Brooke is gonna be around for a while. If I had to guess, I’d say Brooke, Christa and Kenisha will be the last three standing, but maybe he’ll fall madly in love with Ashley on their date.

For the date, Matt picks up Ashley in an old black Ford convertible (I think it was a Thunderbird, maybe), driven by one of his buddies. Matt takes her out to dinner, and tells her that she comes across as being more mature than the other girls, except for the other night. She apologizes, with an excuse that made no sense to me. Something like she has to be the mommy with the girls and she just ended up letting her frustrations out. Um, so when you get drunk you get raunchy and that’s a stress reliever? Anyway, there’s no great chemistry between them, so I’d be OK to see the end of her next week. But just watch, she’ll win immunity next week instead.

Actually, now that I think about it, this is a pretty silly system isn’t it? Cause you might want someone to go, but they might get immunity and then you have to keep them. But honestly, I don’t care that much.

So even though this silly show, Farmer Wants A Wife, has been cancelled and won’t be back next season (and believe me, I could not be more thankful for that), they are continuing to air the rest of the eps for this season. Lucky us! The only reason I’m still watching at this point, is cause I like to finish what I start. Plus, I’m a bit of a masochist, obviously. Thefreedictionary.com defines “masochist” as “a willingness or tendency to subject oneself to unpleasant or trying experiences.” Which just about sums it up.

There can’t be too many more weeks of this, can there?

This week, after a longish and totally unnecessary recap of last week, we start out with Matt talking about his late night visit from Brooke and Lisa, and Brooke also sharing that information (in confidential whispers) with Amanda, who promptly goes and tells everyone else.

Next, we get to watch a goat giving birth. In the pouring rain. My husband still talks about the time we stayed at a B&B on a farm in West Virginia and I held a newborn lamb. It was still kinda icky and he can’t get over it. It was pretty cool, though.

The challenge this week is to pick bushels of corn, two dozen ears in each of three baskets. And then they will be sitting pretty, won’t have to go back to the city. If I hear Matt say that once more, I’ll put my fist through the screen. Brooke wins again. Her second challenge in a row, which made more people mad than happy. Also, Lisa stole one of Amanda’s baskets, sorta on purpose, but also sorta accidentally. Now she’s really worried, cause she was part of the duo that messed up by showing up at Matt’s house in the middle of the night. Since Brooke is safe, that makes Lisa feel much less safe. Stacey, however, was the very last one to finish, which is pretty much par for the course with her.

Christa tells Ashley that the two of them and Amanda are probably the only chicks that are real contenders. But I’m not so sure.

Matt calls the house and tells them there’s going to be a barn dance, and sets up square dance lessons for the chicks. Just watching this week, it seems like Stacey should leave, cause she really comes across as the most high maintenance, making everyone wait in the cars while she searches for an appropriate pair of shoes. But then we only get to see what they want us to see, after all, so who knows.

Then the unholy triumvirate, of Amanda, Ashley and Christa start throwing a hot dog around and giggling, talking about Brooke and Lisa. So mature. Then the chicks dressed up in country square dancing dresses and Matt brought them all corsages and took them to the dance. After a little argument, Ashley gets the first dance with Matt. The next dance is a waltz and Amanda grabbed Matt for that one. Watching all the couples dancing at the barn dance, I realized that I could never live in the country, just for the fashion alone.

At this point, also, I’m wondering just how much longer is this show. Isn’t it over yet?? Plus, at least five more eps, right? *sigh*

I just saw a commercial for another season of Beauty and the Geek. Starting Tuesday. Is that for real? I thought it was cancelled. Its not a repeat of this past season, so maybe it’s a repeat of a different season. I’m gonna have to check it out. *sigh sigh*

For the elimination, the girls have to pour some moonshine from a jug into a jar. If they have enough in their jug to fill the jar, they are staying, if they don’t, they are leaving. Amanda, Christa and Ashley are safe first. Then Kanisha. Leaving only Lisa and Stacey. I think it should be Stacey going hime, really. And it is! Wow, I called it.

Now we have to sit through the date with Matt and Kanisha. The other girls (except maybe for Lisa) bet Kanisha $5 each if she will give Matt a visible hickey on their date. I think that’s a bad idea on her part, but whatever, cause I don’t like her that much anyway. So they go horseback riding, which isn’t really that much fun. At least, I don’t think so. I’m a little afraid of heights, and I went riding once with a friend in Colorado, it was beautiful country, but I spent the entire time just trying to hold on so high off the ground, terrified of falling off. I’d rather go on a romantic hay ride.

And now, finally, its over and I don’t have to watch these people again until next week. Yay, me!

(OK, I went back and checked, and the CW seems to be repeating Season 4 of Beauty and the Geek. I’m not gonna watch it and no one can make me.)

The CW has posted their 2008-2009 season primtime schedule:

MONDAY
8:00-9:00 PM GOSSIP GIRL
9:00-10:00 PM ONE TREE HILL

TUESDAY
8:00-9:00 PM 90210 (New Series)
9:00-10:00 PM SURVIVING THE FILTHY RICH (New Series)

WEDNESDAY
8:00-9:00 PM AMERICA’S NEXT TOP MODEL
9:00-10:00 PM STYLISTA (New Series)

THURSDAY
8:00-9:00 PM SMALLVILLE
9:00-10:00 PM SUPERNATURAL

FRIDAY
8:00-8:30 PM EVERYBODY HATES CHRIS
8:30-9:00 PM THE GAME
9:00-10:00 PM AMERICA’S NEXT TOP MODEL (Encore Presentation)

Notably missing from this schedule are Aliens in America, Beauty and the Geek (just when I started watching it!), Farmer Wants a Wife, Girlfriends, Pussycat Dolls, Life is Wild and WWE Friday Night Smackdown.

It may appear that Reaper is also missing, but don’t worry, it’s coming back mid-season. So we are losing seven shows, and only gaining three, but I think these are good decisions. Maybe annoying reality TV is on the way out, which is a good thing. And apparently, at least on the CW, it’s being replaced with young adult soaps, which can also be a good thing. I guess we’ll find out.

Here’s a link back to the CW blog, where they have lots more info on the shows and what’s happening, as well.

I was surprised to see that they are reviving everyone’s favorite zip code in 90210. I wasn’t a huge fan of the original series, but I was certainly aware of it and I think it will be interesting to see how they have updated and modernized the show. I’m also interested cause I heard Rob Estes is in it and I’m in love with him. And I mean, really.

In any case, it looks like the CW has a great season set up for us and I’m looking forward to checking out the new shows. As for this summer, I plan to also try to catch up on some of the shows from this season that I just didn’t get a chance to watch the first time around. When I do, I’ll let you know all about. You count on that!

For some reason, I’m still watching Farmer Wants a Wife. It must be an illness.

This week, the chicks decide to wash Matt’s truck. Which is basically just an excuse for them to run around in skimpy outfits and squirt each other with the hose.

The girls are then taken to a quilting bee. A couple of them have problems just handling the needles. I’m just so amazed when I see these chicks on reality TV. Are girls honestly so stupid these days, so incapable? Is this where women’s lib has brought us? I could cook and clean and sew when I was in my teens, and I was not brought up on a farm. I was just brought up in a normal home.

Matt suggests that they all go drive tractors. Lisa decides to go in high heels. They get a quick lesson in tractor driving and then have to go haul something from somewhere to somewhere else. Whatever. I’m still not feeling too well. Kanisha cannot figure out how to get the tractor in gear. Then she gets turned on by a sweaty Matt coming to her rescue. Can I just say ewww?

Brooke is the winner, and it makes everyone else angry cause they don’t like her. She just beat out Krista who had been in the lead, but dropped a hay bale and had to go back. The other Christa is really starting to get on my nerves. She just always seems to have an attitude about everything. Christa brings on the drama with Brooke and it was all just too weird. I’m not even honestly sure what it was all about.

Tomorrow is going to be a group date and the girls are told to bring their bikinis. They have a little picnic down by the river and then they swim. Matt is throwing a stick around and hits Krista in the hand. Isn’t she the same one who got hurt last week? I don’t know, they all look alike.

To find out who is leaving, he has someone come and stitch a name into an embroidered picture. It seems like they would figure it out too quickly, but maybe they can’t spell. It looks like it will be Lisa, but it’s not, then maybe Krista or Christa. But it turns out its Krista. Matt says he felt like he was boring her. Krista was crying and telling him he was getting played by some of the others.

Matt then chooses Amanda to go on a one-on-one date. He takes her on a date to have dinner with his parents!! It goes surprisingly well.

But afterwards, Brooke and Lisa sneak out and go to see Matt. At first he seems a little taken aback, but then he sits and talks to them. They are a little worried that they just did something that is going to get them cut, but it looks like they are safe at least until next week. When the girls go square dancing!

Wow, this was my blog for last week. I don’t know what happened, but it looks like it didn’t post. Let me try this again. (Before I blog for this week’s show).

This week on Farmer Wants a Wife, the girls start out washing pigs. Stacy bumps her head, but just keeps going. Two of the girls, Lisa and Josie, don’t really get involved.

Next, they perform some chores: milking goats, marking cows, muck out stalls. Personally, I’m pretty sure I could not milk a goat. Milk comes from the store in nice little containers and I’ve never cared how it got there. Just watching them made me unhappy. I’m fairly certain I don’t see myself running around in a pen full of cows, either. In a twist, however, Lisa was doing the very best in this challenge. Josie, of course, was not. Lisa’s main competition was some other blond girl (Krista), who actually won.

Darn it, now I’m being forced to learn their names.

There was some talk about Matt still being a virgin, because Josie asked him if he would want to have sex before committing to marriage and he said he would want to wait. God bless the little country boy.

Next they all go on a group date to play bingo at the VFW post. It seemed like a real shock to the system of all these old farm folk to have a group of city chicks descend on their bingo game. Josie was being annoying and obnoxious, as usual. She starts asking everyone at her table if they are Republican and how you can tell if a farmer is wealthy. Lisa then separates Matt from the group to head to the bar. Some of the other girls show up to also hang out. Matt brings them back into the bingo game and has the girls introduce themselves and talk a little bit to the community. I guess I can learn the names: Christa, Amanda, Krista, Kanisha, Ashley, Brooke, Stacy, Lisa, Josie. They all sucked. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

Now it’s elimination time. He sends the chicks out of the room and takes advice from the bingo crowd. Mostly, they didn’t seem to like Lisa or Josie. And I agree. Krista is immune, so she doesn’t have to take part in the special bingo game. Only one person won’t get bingo and that’s the person who goes home. So what I learned, is that it’s possible to fix a bingo game. Remind me not to play. If I’m ever that bored.

It’s Josie who is going home. Which is a good thing, cause she’s so over the top, she takes time and attention away from the other girls. She complains that Matt is cheap and all he can offer a girl is work. She argues and won’t leave, insisting she should get a present, until he threatens to have someone take her out. She finally goes out of the room and says she’s too good for him. Josie then goes back into the house, refusing to pack or to leave without a gift. So the girls pack her stuff and carry it out on to the porch. Josie still refuses to leave and the guy who is supposed to take her doesn’t look happy. If I was there, I’d have grabbed that fat, ugly skank by her greasy hair and pulled her off that porch into the dirt where she belongs. Wow, where did that come from? What absolutely classless what trash she is. She just sits there hour after hour refusing to leave until Matt brings her a gift. Finally, she gives in and goes. But not until way after the rest of us were ready for her to go.

Matt then chooses to have a one-on-one date with Stacy. While they are on their date, the other girls get cleaned up and go to the local bar. Matt has set up a place to watch a movie on the side of a barn. He had deck chairs, candles, wine (at least it was a bottle of something) and popcorn. The film appears to be an old black and white, but I don’t know of what. Stacy mostly talks, lots and lots of talk. She wants to make sure he doesn’t care that she’s not a virgin (he doesn’t).

The girls meanwhile, are playing pool and chatting. Except for Lisa and Brooke, who are very busy flirting with guys. It has been pointed out that they are the two that are constantly saying they are Christians, and I think they are supposed to be the two virgins.

In any case, it looks like we’ll have even more drama next week, so be sure to tune in. You know, if you’re really, really bored.

There’s another new show full of interchangeably random chicks. It’s Farmer Wants a Wife. I have to watch this with the volume turned way down, cause my husband would flip out. He hates all reality TV and thinks I already watch too much as it is. I really had no intention of watching this show, but since I was already DVRing at least a dozen shows while I was out of town, I figured I’d record the first ep of this show, too.

So here I find myself watching these city girls looking to find love with a country man. (”You are my wife, goodbye city life.”) I watch these little girls and I wonder if I was ever that shallow. I guess I’m really old fashioned, but chicks in their early 20’s just aren’t grown ups in my book. I’m just amazed by how they can be so immature and think they are adults, all at the same time. I guess I’d call it socially adult as opposed to emotionally immature. I must say that none of these chicks is as cute as some of the chicks on other shows, like Beauty and the Geek or The Bachelor. They are all pretty average looking, actually. But then he’s not that cute either. If I decide to keep watching, I’ll learn their names, but until then, probably not. Interestingly, we find out at least a couple of them are virgins, especially since I was still reeling from their overall loose morals and lack of character.

So they take a look around the farm and first they get to hold chickens, then feed the cows. Some of them are afraid of the birds and flip out over stepping in cow poop in high heels. The next day they are woken up at 5 am, by a rooster, which apparently at least one girl thought were not real creatures.

First up they have a challenge. Whoever coops up the most chickens is safe from elimination. One girl - a fat, pushy, annoying chick named Josie who thinks she’s all that - refuses to chase around after chickens, because that’s not how a lady behaves. Believe me when I say this chick wouldn’t know a lady if one was kicking her in the head. Two of the girls end up with 10 chickens a piece, so the farmer (who must have name, but I don’t care enough to find it out) proposes a “coop off”, with 7 more coops to be filled. The chick who wins is kinda annoying, so I wasn’t happy.

Next they go on a hay ride and he chats with each girl, asking them about themselves. It’s not an experience I want to relive here.

Then we have the elimination. So he has them all stand behind a chicken coop. Whoever doesn’t have an egg under their chicken is going home. I would have voted for Josie or Stephanie. Josie is annoying and Stephanie just didn’t really seem to fit into the farming lifestyle. Well, it was Stephanie, which was OK. I wish he could have gotten rid of two of them, though.

Next, the farmer picks one of the girls to go on a date with. I’m not sure these chicks really understand what the term date means to someone who lives on a farm, but we’ll see. The chick he picked has at least a couple of piercings, and they look weird, even on my big screen TV, the earrings look like big zits or moles. While he is on the date - a bench set up under a canopy with candles and mint juleps - some of the other girls get caught toilet papering his truck. He does kiss his date chick, like three times, but it was just pecks, not real kisses.

Honestly, the show just seemed to go on much too long.